on rejection and loss
Did I scare ya with that title, so soon after my last loving post about S.?
Sowwy.
On rejection: I learn so much from my students, this is true. And I have no poker face, this is evident. But when, during a discussion of Facebook and Myspace this other day in class, we got to discussing the mechanization of "friending," my students told me about the rejection hotline, I about died. This, folks, is rejection for the new millenium. Or maybe I'm just completely out of it and it's not all that new (it's not), but I'm still shocked. See, if you're out at a party or a bar and an undesirable asks for your number, you can give them one of these numbers (for Chicago, my friends, it's 773.509.5027) and when the poor chap calls, they get a recording telling them that they've been rejected. My students played it for me in class from one of their cell phones set to speaker. Remember the good ol' days when you had to reject someone live on the other end of the phone?
On loss: My Alaska sister wrote to me this morning to ask if it was okay if they included my name in a newspaper memorial they're (who's "they," was my first question) planning on running next month as it will be the 30th anniversary of my father's death. To be honest, I hadn't even thought about the fact that it'd be 30 years (December 3, 1976, the day after my oldest brother's 14th birthday). But there it is. And I get to imagine once again how different my life would've been had he lived longer. There's no doubt in my mind that I'm the last to hear of this plan, that I was an afterthought, that the email my sister sent was nothing more than perfunctory since they're including my name in it. Mechanized memorializing, as it were.
And as of right now, my mother knows nothing about this plan. Tell me what that says about rejection and loss. So I guess I'm NOT the last to hear of this plan. Christ.
posted by aerobil @ 6:22 AM
3 comments
3 Comments:
There's a chapter for the memoir...it's amazing how differently siblings respond to these things...we're all such different people, despite the shared DNA and experiences...
Hi Amy,
Wow, I'm so sorry you had to imagine how your life might have been...again. I doubt his intention was to ruin your life by dying too soon. Apparently, you blogged before getting my response to your questions. Yep, we're all against you, and you were an afterthought. In my email I explained why Ma hadn't been told yet. And I used "we" because I thought you might not want to be included if you thought it was Margie's idea. How pathetic that I have to tiptoe around, in hopes that you'll let us include your name. Wouldn't it be nice if we could do these kinds of things as a family, without all the drama. Something Cesar Milan, the "Dog Whisperer," says all the time comes to mind: People could learn from dogs. They live in the moment and move one. They don't dwell in the past and get stuck there.
Ah, public internet blogging. What a marvelous idea.
About the rejection hotline--it's basically a new twist on a way to get rid of total strangers who cannot take no for an answer and annoy a woman in a public place to be point of being offensive:
In days of yore when I was in my early 20s (don't tell anyone, that was almost 50 years ago), I had memorized the telephone number of the County Jail. In extremis I would reluctantly give in to the obnoxious SOB and rattle off the number. His chest would puff out and he would strut off pleased with himself, and I often wondered if he ever tried to call!
Shoe
Post a Comment
<< Home